This Charming Place.

Woke up in the middle of a dream, with you, without you, it really didn't matter.  Stumbling over little parts of you I didn't know were there, tripping my way to the bathroom to have a quick look in the mirror and maybe brush my teeth if I'm feeling up to it.  One track mind: coffee.  Mornings are such shit sometimes.  What if I wanted to stay in that dreaming state all day and all evening long?  Why does the sun dictate my time, the way I spend it, who I share it with?  Analyzing what it means to wake up happy and immediately feel overcome with sadness the minute my legs escape the blankets.  It is a feeling of inadequacy in the real world, knowing I have to begin the day with real people and participate in real life events, rather than exist in this state in which I can create and destroy and I am ultimately the master of?  Pathetic.  But perhaps it is nothing like this at all, maybe I am just lazy.  Maybe I feel I have nothing to gain and nothing to offer from whatever this day holds.  Trapped in this silly little circle, up, down, twist, play, work, up, fall, laugh, run, down, cry, hold, touch, scream, move, be, stop.  Start all over again.  Someone just open my blinds and tie back my curtains already.  Pull me out of bed by my feet, this is getting old.